BCS Enablers Look In The Mirror

For New Year’s Day I decided to go to the Minneapolis Institute of Arts to try and check out their huge exhibition, “The Louvre and the Masterpiece,” before it leaves town on the 10^th.  I couldn’t get in because, get this, they were all booked up.  All booked up?  How much space do you need to look at an Ingres?  Or are you eating there?

I thought about going back home for a millisecond before realizing there was nothing on.  Well, there was the Winter Classic, but by the time it got home it’d probably be over.  The only sporting event that might be on would be … the Rose Bowl.  Ugh.  And then I remembered why I left the house.  And then I knew I had to write about it.

Guys, if you hate the BcS with a passion and want to see it die, there is one thing you can do to hasten its deserved demise.  It might be tough, given that you’re back from visiting your relatives for Christmas and you are still recovering from your vomit-filled New Year’s Party and the only thing you want to do is sit down and watch TV till you have to go back to work on Monday.  But this is important to do if you think the lack of a playoff in college football’s top tier is, like, the worst problem ever.  Don’t worry, folks, I can boil this down to just three words.

Do.  Not.  Watch.

It is that simple.  The only thing that sustains the BcS is money from advertising, and that is controlled by viewers like you.  The four-year, $500 million contract ESPN signed with this conspiracy is $170 million more than the current contract FOX paid these chumps to televise their exhibitions and Mythical National Championship games until this year’s MNC in Pasadena on Thursday.  (Aside: Why in the hell is the “title game” of a national sport being played on a weeknight?  College football should end on Jan. 1, but at least put this game on a Saturday night so everybody can stay up to watch, for God’s sake.)  The per-year average paid to the BcS couldn’t increase unless ESPN thought there was an audience there.

And there is.  That’s the problem: I think many of you who think the BcS sucks throw up your hands and watch the games anyway.  Your willing attendance helps this infernal contraption thrive, convincing sports networks to pay more money for the perpetuation of this travesty.  Why are you helping them?

So do something else when these games are on.  For last year’s MNC, I went to the Mall of America and watched Doubt instead – good movie, didn’t feel like I wasted my time.  Clean your house.  Shovel the driveway.  Play with your kids.  Have sex with your mistress yourself your wife.  Or get cultured and go to an art museum or a zoo or a performance by your local chamber orchestra.  Get out of the house so you don’t have to watch these games and contribute to its success.  You can resume your sedentary, misanthropic life as soon as Alabama or Texas wins that fraudulent, effeminate crystal football.

You can’t just depend on other people to change stuff you don’t like.  Sometimes you have to get up off your ass and do something about it.  And when the herculean task is just shutting off the TV, why not stick it to the BcS?  Because when it comes to something so evil, not liking it is not enough.  Enablers who do nothing to stop it are just as bad as those who profit from it.  And if you believe it won’t hurt to watch the game because you’re just one person, you’re part of the problem.